If you train to the point where you can't even cry anymore because it takes too much energy, that's a good start I think. Mental toughness from physical training carries over to many many things. That's why the military is so keen on physically pounding recruits into the ground, as when you've got nothing left and can reach down inside and find something more to keep going, that's what you need to win.
A good point, well made. It might be that that's all she needs: just to train harder and toughen up. Impossible to tell for sure without knowing the lass - at the end of the day, only she can answer it. She needs to be honest with herself.
This reminds me, I have a cousin that was competing at an olympic level for long distance running. Her training philosophy was "When you puke, you're done."
Most of the times my puking comes once I stop. I've never actually puked while running, though I'm sure that would be quite the mess.
I haven't read all the posts in this thread yet, but it seems to me that *if* your trainer is really training you, then why isn't he making you do some sparring and *gradually* raising the intensity. You don't just learn to fight by jumping into a ring with a more experienced fighter, nor do you learn to swim by jumping into the ocean. What kind of training is your instructor putting you through? If he's not doing anything besides critiquing your fighting, fire him and find a coach who'll really train you at your level. Kuma, The Bear, and other members who are saying that mental toughness is what you need are right, but just like physical conditioning takes time, so does mental conditioning. You need to be trained to be mentally tough and a good coach should be able to do it. Disclaimer: I don't box (I WANT to), and I don't have any experience in full contact sparring, or any kind of sparring that is really nitty and gritty, but that's what I think. I hope you can toughen yourself up and keep improving.
Having read further posts and replies I seriously question the trainer. A young lady pushed into the ring with little to no training, no footwork or defensive drills, no training in bobbing, weaving, rolling with the punches, no previous pad work, smells fishy to me, has this trainer got any real qualifications? Training till yuoupuke is okay, but I think we need to wind the training back and get back to simple basics. I woulkd not want a young student just to train till they are sick or can take a whack, I want then to fully understand the mechanics of what they are doing.
Many good fighters have come out of the gym that I train at, but they were trained by the head trainer who is now elderly. Now there is a new trainer who takes sparring and mitt work, he is a professional fighter. Unfortunately there are no other boxing clubs in my district to choose from. I wish I could take training at one step at a time instead of being thrown into something I feel uncomfortable doing. I hope that my trainer has picked up on that. I love sparring and I wouldn't want anything else more than to step in the ring and enjoy it, while challenging myself at the same time. The last thing I want to do is step out of the ring and cry, not only is it humiliating, but in my mind also disrespectful. It dosn't happen to me everytime I spar. Usually it happens when I feel hopeless in the ring and unable to fight back yet alone defend myself. My mind becomes overwhelmed, all it takes then is a good punch to the solar plexus. I remember my trainer telling to get out and pivot, I tried but my opponent kept coming, in the end I couldn't keep up with him. I didn't want to cry but I was so frustrated and disappointed with myself, I couldn't help it. I wasn't crying from the physical pain. I don't want to be the person that throws her hands up in the air and walks out, I want to keep fighting.
A good fighter does not a good coach make. Are there any other boxing schools/clubs in your area you could try out?
People seem to be missing this. Your trainer says you need to work basics before you get in the ring again to make sure you benefit from the experience next time and don't get hurt. That's good, he's looking after you. You need to listen to him, train hard, do what he says "for a few months" until you're ready to spar. Train hard, set goals, do what he says and try your hardest for a short period of time and then you'll be ready for sparring. Nobody likes being told they're not ready yet. Everyone in any MA has had to face the fact at some stage or another. Time to buckle down to the hard work on the pads and bag, then step into the ring in a few months when your coach says you're ready and face some fears. In the meantime, train! Mitch
Instead of crying you need to get MAD. I know some people like to subscribe to the Star Wars "Dark Side" mumbo jumbo that anger causes bad things, but controlled anger is one of the best "Warrior motivators" out there. Note I sad "anger" and not "rage". There is a difference.
LOL... Same for me, only I didn't puke until about half an hour after passing out. My team-mates admired me for running to the point passing out, but I still feel like passing out was the same as giving up. I wondered why the back of my head hurt and they told me they found me upside down in a ditch. It was an experience that I definitely don't want to repeat.
lol, I am pretty sure she would feel it coming and then stop. But the point is that you have to push your limits if you want to succeed.
okay, so now we know that there is quality instruction available you definately need to talk to the coach. I suggest saying something like " I want to train at this gym, which I understand is training boxers who want to compete, but can you show me how to build up a progression in order that I don't get left behind in the ring" Is there anyone else at the gym near your level who could work the pads with you. Progression is so important as is enjoying your training. Good luck.
Don't forget Hapuka that you had the corage to walk into the place and start training to begin with. That took guts. You'll be alright
I don't like the "do something till you can't do more and then do a little more" mentality. It's not that simple, and if you use that philosophy for everything in martial arts training you're going to end up getting burned out at best and seriously injured at worst. You have to know when to push your limits, and when to let them adjust. If someone lifted heavy weights every single day, just to "push past their limits," they'd be having some pretty hefty problems soon enough. Hapuka clearly does not lack drive. She seems to really want to be a good boxer and have a lot of fun. We all realize that it takes a LOT of guts to keep coming back to that kind of training. However, a student is a student and the intensity of her training should be raised gradually until her mind and her body are both ready for it. I think she needs a coach (not a fighter, but a COACH) to train her body and mind to the point where she CAN push her limits. I think she needs a base of solid skill and confidence that she can develop through proper coaching. No disrespect intended towards those who advocate the "push yourself past your limit" method. Sometimes that is a fine approach, but not always, and not often for beginners. Patrick
Look, It doesn't matter how big and bad and tough you are. When you get into a sparring/fighting situation with someone else, your brain will interpret it as a traumatic experience. It's going to go balls to the wall crazy, release crazy hormones and do crazy things. The way you are going to respond is going to be as unique as your face or the lines in your hands. Whether you like it or not, you can decide whatever you want. But when your brain enters the traumatic experience, it will do what it is programmed to do, not what you decide it will do. I used to get the same sensation after getting caught by shots I felt like I should have been able to deal with. If I was in to all that Kung Fu chi crap I'd tell you I sunk my chi from my head to my dan tien. As it happens, I figured out what it was in my training, in my programming that was putting me in these situations. I was scared of what was coming in and I had trouble dealing with it because I blinked and froze when I got scared. So I got with these Tabimina Balintawak guys who have programmed out the fear and the blink. The real key here is that you have to get into context when you train your stuff. That means you have to put your brain in the same situation that sparring does - in terms of pressure and intensity, and what ranges and tools you use and deal with. This will help you to replicate the level of mental activity and hormone balance you are dealing with when you step in the ring. The problem here is that the brain is having to deal with intense stimulus, and the only way your brain knows how to handle that stimulus is to interpret it as emotional trauma. That's why you cry. You have to teach your brain that there is another way to handle the stimulus. I used to feel traumatized after bad sparring sessions. Now I just get sick to my stomach when my sessions get too intense for me, which is way easier to deal with. The best tools boxers have to deal with this is pad work. You need your coach to put you on some intense defense drills on the pads. You tell him your favorite amateur Neuroscientist recommends it.
I never said you have to push your limits all the time at the same thing. A weightlift could push his upper body limits on Monday, Wednesday, Friday, push his lower body limits on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday, and then push his limits in Cardio on Sunday. You can push your limits everyday and still train smart. I agree that people should raise their work out intensity gradually, but only because their limits rise gradually. If you can do 30 push ups in a row, why keep doing 15 or twenty push ups in a row? Some people will see great results from a work out and use it for months, years even, and then wonder why it's not producing the same results.
