fear of sparring

Discussion in 'Tae Kwon Do Resources' started by Din, Mar 3, 2004.

  1. Timmy Boy

    Timmy Boy Man on a Mission

    I would never consider someone a thug if they're fighting in self-defence, no matter how vicious. At the end of the day, if people are going to start fights with you then they deserve what they get.
  2. Kenpo Kicker

    Kenpo Kicker New Member

    I always fight to win. I would rather not have my head caved in.
  3. Oldie

    Oldie New Member

    It makes sense to some people that no matter how big or how rough the other person is, sparring imitates real life situations. But in a class situation, sparring needs to be properly supervised.

    Perhaps some people are really afraid of sparring the bigger and nastier people, or feel that the instructors do not pair them with people their sizes and skill levels. I recall a similar scenario when I was a green belt being paired with a 2nd dan. Now that was really unfair. I was a mere 170 pounds and this guy was 245 pounds, and 4 inches taller! After throwng a few punches, landing only one on him, and trying to kick him real hard when he came closer, he charged at me... I evaded his attack, but he chased me and when I regained my footing he was way too close for me to counter. I ran away and threw a nasty back kick at his mid section.

    I thought I did a pretty good job. But then when I turned around, he was standing right in front of me... I got wacked pretty good; I couldn't block more than a couple of his strikes and punches. In fact, he sent me flying. My back hit the wall and I fell to the ground, unconscious....

    Afterwards, he told me that he didn't know I was that weak. I told him that he had to exercise some control. I wasn't as skilled as he or even his size. The Master Instructor looked the other way (the 2nd dan was one of his instructors, and probably the Master Instructor didn't want to interfere). I would call that sparring session lacking supervision.

    The following week, I sparred the same guy again. I wanted to spar him first, so I could overcome my own fear. I still got wacked pretty good but felt that I was doing my best.

    I also had the luck to spar him when I took my 1st dan test, when he was going for his 3rd dan. I sparred him as if my life depended on it. I wasn't going to get my black belt by baking cookies. He and I have an age difference of 26 years. I was 53 yrs old.

  4. alex_000

    alex_000 You talking to me?

    LOL You own! :D
  5. tomoc

    tomoc Valued Member

    What I will do is spar the student that is afraid to make contact, then give them a target to hit. Sometimes I will put my hands behind my back and try to avoid there kicks. As they chase me trying to make contact, I stop moving and they hit. When they see that I survived they continue. A few rounds like that and they will be making contact.

    Remember, most people are raised to believe that hitting another person is wrong. Be patient, it takes a while for people to change. It does happen... then watch out!
  6. ahkyte

    ahkyte Tang Sou Dao

    I was never comfatable with sparring.... Not totally anyway, I could never employ the techniques I had been training with, and got so frustrated that I ended up kicking air... That and being slightly intimidated by the people I was sparring....

    We spar senior belts at our club, and they control our techniques, sometimes giving us targets to hit like available space on the torso etc..... as you progress up the belt rank's the level of sparring gets harder and harder, contact is still controlled light to medium force.... The fact is put to yellow belts together and odd's are neither will be too sure what to do, or how to control... The experience of a senior belt guiding the student is a must in this situation.

    One other thing worth trying is giving your students a short objective, have one on defence and one on attack..... and then alternate.... scoring points etc etc.....

    I say that because I never really enjoyed sparring until after my national championships this year... Then it all became much more fun..

    Waffle mode off !
  7. alex_000

    alex_000 You talking to me?

    Everybody is afraid at first.. Then you are punched in the nose (outch). Then in the nose again. The opponent smiles .. Then is your time to punch :D
  8. Taliar

    Taliar Train harder!

    You need to change the way you spar depending on who you are sparring with, and everyone on your club should spar with everyone else. When I spar against other people who enjoy sparring and are good at it we up the tempo to full speed.

    People who do not like sparring and the contact invloved are normaly not that good at sparring and this effects their confidence. You should be trying to help them. Give them openings to attack you and teach them to recognise them, encourage them to hit you, (with little kids i hold my gloves infront of them and get them to attack them, then get them to attack me.) Also i think you need to hit them, not hard but land a few kicks and punch them so they learn that it doesn't hurt. (if little old 6'3" dosen't hurt then a kid their own age won't either). This will also help them to keep their guard up as often people who spar out of range have a very poor defense as they are never in any danger of being hit.

    Keep talking to them and encourage them, as seniors this is part of our duty. Lots of the kids at out club like to spar with me because they want to be good and spar like the adults do but they need someone to show them how and help them get their confidence.

    P.S. Just watch your family jewels fella's cos they love to punch ya there, and you have to watch for the scared little lad who suddenly whacks you oneand thinks its funny.
  9. Ling Kuo

    Ling Kuo New Member

    I know exactly what you mean Taliar! Little kids just love to hit you in that area! When I first started TKD I felt really nervous when it came to sparring. There was this one time when I was fighting a blue belt who was from Israel and as soon as we started I had a flurry of punches on my face. I instinctively shot out my leg in a side kick keeping by head down. I accidentaly hit him in a bad place and he was writhing on the floor for ten minutes. After that I made it a priority to buy a groin guard. Now adays I am still nervous at sparring but whats the worst that could happen after a lesson of sparring with my instructor! :D
  10. kenpoguy

    kenpoguy The Last Dragon


    My style is kenpo, and please allow me to speak the following from my own experience fighting and instructing. I never personally had that problem as to where i wouldnt hit the other person, as I started the whole martial arts experience with boxing and kickboxing. Although instructing, I have seen such a thing many times. And contrary to what a previous poster said, I have in fact seen many girls that are extremly aggresive!! And i am a male by the way. In fact a couple of the ones ive taught and help teach have won 1st and 2nd place in tournaments fairly recently in sparring. There is one case of an older male i can think of, in which he was pretty cautious abuot the whole sparring thing. He had the helmet with the whole face mask, and pads and all of the gear. Not as bad as the redman suit but not to non-extreme either. The best way that i think for someone to learn to spar is to you(as the instructor) personally spar the person. And by all means drill them. I was also the type of person who literally had to have the idea "drilled into me" by my own instructor. Dont obviously go all out, just literally spar with them. Dont fight to win, fight to teach them. After they are comfortable with you move them on to people who actually know how to spar with control. Control only comes with experience, and the more they spar the more experience they will have.
  11. kenpoguy

    kenpoguy The Last Dragon


    Oh and on one more not, one of the kids at my studio i taught arnis too. While i wasnt looking he hit me in the leg and i ignored it(was talking to another instrucotr at the time), and then he hit me right inbetween the legs and in the family jewels :cry:

    BUT one thing that may help again with the sparring is the following. Dont place too heavy of an emphasis on point or timed rounds. Mix them up and dont stick with any single one unless training in that for a purpose. Point drills build speed, while timed drills build endurance and is where i think everthing really comes together. But also dont forget that sport fighting and street fighting are two differnt things. :)
  12. Ling Kuo

    Ling Kuo New Member

  13. kenpoguy

    kenpoguy The Last Dragon


    someone that has no control(doesnt even try to so to speak) and they punch you is literally a slap in the face. I was sparring a grown woman not two weeks ago , and it was her first tiem back to the studio in about a year, and I was told by the head instructors to get her to move around and get her to fight back. So im moving around, and i jam her up pretty much every fight,waiting for her to find a way out of it. The space we were sparring on was pretty small so breaks were called if somoene ran into one of the walls. She must have hit me flat in the nose about 3 times after break was called. Ive taken full power shots directly to the head and face plenty of times from skillfull fighters, but what she did was plain disrespect. I didnt mind it so much as it was her first time in around a year sparring, but man was her instructor ticked off. But I can see your point about TKD for the wrong reasons. I hate more than anything being called a "Tkd basher" because im not. Its just a well known fact that TKD is more sport fighting than it is street fighting. I actually had 2 posts closed down stating this. But even so, was she at least told how to behave during sparring or given a warning or something?(not sure of her age)
  14. Ling Kuo

    Ling Kuo New Member

    She wasn't given a warning that I know of but my instructor made sure I fought someone else every other time. My instructor (who is a grand master) only tells off little kids who don't know better but he makes us learn the tennets for every belt test. That girls not been to my TKD class for a while but hopefully when she does come back she'll be a show a little more self-control.
    I like sparring a lot and I like fighting people a lot better than me as long as they show some respect and remain true to the bow at the start;)
  15. kenpoguy

    kenpoguy The Last Dragon


    in my opinion, you handled it correctly, but your instructor did not. In all honesty it probably would have been better for you two to keep sparring. Sometimes it just takes a while to get conformatble, i guess is the best way to say what im trying to say. But sparring is really somethign that can be enjoyed if you take the time to appreciate it. And even though sparring isnt practical for the street, it is effective for giving someone the guts to defend themselves.
  16. d33pthought

    d33pthought New Member

    There's a woman in our club who was always really timid about sparring. She came in with a yellow belt from the ymca across the street, and her techniques needed work, to say the least. First time we sparred together, I was a white belt, and she was really shy about doing much of anything. She said she didn't want to hurt me, but I said no, it's ok. I'm durable. BIGGEST MISTAKE THIS YEAR! Now she pretty much goes all-out, and has a habit of ramming into her opponent (me, usually). Also, she wears shoes because of flat feet and it hurts when she steps on mine :D . On the upside, I landed my first really clean, solid kick on her since we met, and, I'm happy to say, would have landed her on her butt if I put any effort into it.
  17. Hapuka

    Hapuka Te Aho

    Over coming the fear of sparring

    Hi, I have lost my mojo in the area of sparring. When I was white I used to love sparring, but now....... I get scared when I do it. What has happened to me? Somtimes I start crying and I can't handle it. Some of you people will say toughen up. But what can I do to get over this? This is starting to become a bumer of a problem. :bang:
  18. Hapuka

    Hapuka Te Aho

    Thats me :bang:. Any advice?
  19. Hapuka

    Hapuka Te Aho

    Im planning on joining a kick boxing club as well to help over come the fear of sparring and thoughen up.
  20. Bruce Lee II

    Bruce Lee II Banned Banned

    i am hesitanyt because im afraid of counter attacks, as me and the people i spar are ver highly skilled. we go all out, and we get broken feet, shins, ankles anll the time . i broke my ankle 2 days ago, and the other ankle has been brokes for 2 weeks. thats how often we get hurt. but anyways, its something you have to get over, as a nunstructor, you have to motivate. tell them" go go go you faggot just hit him" and tell the to got full contact so that thry dont make an excuse. trust me that will work. tell ethem to make up theur minds nd go straight fulll out every teqnique. ok bie

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