Greeting to all MAP fellows, I don't write often in the forum of MAP, because i don't feel like I got something to bring. Anyway, now i'm ****. When I was 13 years old, I was obese. Sick of that, I started Weight-lifting and cardio, and at 18, i'm now in "good shape", I mean, I weighted around 230 pounds at 13 and now doing 164 at 19. But now, I try and tryed to cut and have a good look, but I still got the "flabby" look, even if i'm doing plenty of cardio and following a strict nutritionist "calorie-counting" diet. Oh yeah, I never feel so good, it's very good for my health and my self-esteem, but why do I need a self-esteem if anyway i'm refusing friend invitation and trip to be able to respect my diet and training. I'm not those mesomorph people who can look like superstar, I'm a damn endomorph who can take 30 pounds only because I'm thinking of a toast with peanut butter on ( ohhh man to many fat and all with that amidon-crap). I'm training so much for so little now, kinda anoying on the motivation. Now, let's talk about martial art. At 8 years old I did karate Shotokan. I don't know why I stoped at 12, but after my second blue belt, I feel like my instructor gave belt as easy as a granny would give candies to childrens. After that at 15 i started boxing. I found it very interesting, so i continued, and after 3 years spending effort to be choosen for the amateur ligue, i got refused, lacking of talent they said. weeeee And lately, I started Capoeira, I find this martial art amusing, but again, It's take me much time to learn boxing correctly, and in all respect, it's not the hardest one to learn the basic, so it's a real pain trying to learn the basic of capoeira. And with all my instructor who gain enough "cord" to teach start learning capoeira at 7-8 years old, I find myself kinda in late. Why am I doing that last sentence? Because I'm not doing martial arts completely for my health, or for my stress reliever, i'm taking it in hope of becoming a good fighter, make it a part of my life and be able to compete again other to prove to myself i'm able to achieve something. But all those good though is unreal. Even with all the dedication and sacrifice I'm ready to give, I saw with deception that you born with the ability to make it or not. Great fighter born with talent, ressource, propice environnement, people to support them to accomplish their dreams. And when you're lacking of some of those, you just can't follow what you would call a passion. Don't know why i'm writting all this, i'm just tired of trying to losing. Maybe i'm only whining, if that so, all moderator, feel free to delete this thread. And again, sorry for my bad spelling, i try to do my best. For all those living similar situation, i'm sorry my friends, I can't help you, I'm still looking for the answer. But one thing is sure ; it's a really little sorrow compare to hell that some people live in. peace
Good fighters aren't just born. They work at it. Some are definitly born with more talent, but I'm of the belief that anyone can learn to be a good fighter if they work hard enough at it. What do you want to do with fighting ability? Just self-defense, or do you want to compete in fighting event?
So, it sounds like you may not become a great fighter. Ok. So what? Very few of us will ever be truly great in our fields of passion, but that doesn't negate the reason for following the passion. Martial arts are about making you better. They impart better balance, better focus, better power and technique, and these things will make you a better fighter. They may also make you a more compassionate person, and allow you to relate better with others (or not, depends on the philosophy behind the style(s) you study and whether or not you but into it). Very few instructors will promise to make you the best, and if they did, I would run far and fast cause they're trying to scam you. Stop comparing yourself with everyone around you and start comparing yourself to you. Are you better, faster, stronger, etc. than you were before you started training? If so, fantastic, the martial arts are working well for you. If not, why not? Is it a lack of dedication, an attitude problem, an instructor who does not know how to properly teach you (my advice, look carefully at yourself before taking the easy route and blaming the instructors!) or any of a host of other possibilities? This goes back to the talent vs. determination question (use the search function for an interesting read). A determined martial artist is very likely to eventually pass someone with much greater natural talent and less determination... eventually. In my own training, I've seen dozens of more talented martial artists throw in the towel for a number of reasons... most of which boil down to a lack of determination. I'm still here plugging away at it, and I will reach my goals.
I think there are two things that make good fighters: 1. Humility - the ability to realize that your stuff sucks (martial arts wise), and the resolve and dedication to do something about it. I don't think I've ever heard a really good fighter say "Yeah, my ground game is good." They all say "I really need to work on my ground game." 2. Love - you have to love what you are doing. I don't mean love competing or love beating the brains out of people. You have to love practicing martial arts. I'm kinda flabby, but I don't care. I'll never be as cut as a movie star or a pro thai fighter, but I don't care. I'm happy with how I look, and even though my performance isn't where I'd like it to be, but that's ok. My skills are nothing, but I work hard and smart every day to improve. I don't want to fight. I don't even really care about defending myself. I'll just buy a gun if I'm that worried about it. I just love what I do.
Nothing of those, I want to teach it, so i need to masterize it first. But anyway, nothing to care about now, i think i'm just not in a good mood now, got a job i hate, nothing around to pratice, and other problem like that, let close this thread, the worse is done. Thank for your support
So what's the lesson to be learned here? To my mind, it's that you can't defeat somebody else and prove yourself if you can't even find a way to get past your own lack of motivation. And I'm not accusing YOU of anything. I think this is something that many of us struggle with. And we either find a way to get past it or we quit. You may take this as meaningless psychobabble. But whatever. My first suggestion would be to take all the negativity you've got peppered through your posts and dump it. All of it. "Lord of the doomed souls"?! Good grief, I feel like quitting something just reading that. It may seem romantic, but to me it just reads like a license to fail. Just my thought. Stuart
That's what it's all about. If more people had that kind of outlook the world would be a less stressful place. Each person has their own personal goals and reasons for training in MA. But to enjoy doing what you do is the most important of all. :love:
