The return of the 'Crap Towns List'

Discussion in 'Off Topic Area' started by Johnno, Oct 7, 2013.

  1. Johnno

    Johnno Valued Member

  2. Infesticon #1

    Infesticon #1 Majesticon

    York is in the top 10? It must have changed a lot since I was at uni. It was a fantastic city!

    And I think Basingstoke is now off the list? I dunno about that :p
     
  3. Princess Haru

    Princess Haru Valued Member

    I've just looked at the list but (apart from London) it didn't give reasons why they (and not others) are on the list.

    Here's my bid for Cambridge:

    Yes, it does have a world ranking University (and the train/bus connections to London are frequent), but they also have a virtual stranglehold on any development in the centre and for quite a few miles out. This means that just about any entertainment is dead. Music scene is dead. Cinemas are dead. Nightclubs, pah, they are dead too.

    But I hear what you're saying, surely they can't control everything. No they don't. Recently, there has been a spell of property developments all sold to foreign money sponging buy to let investments, as if we didn't already have a serious shortage of affordable or indeed any accommodation. These lovely development companies have the City Council around their thumb, unable to challenge their planning regulation violations in the courts (lack of funding and those pesky high legal fees), so just about anything goes, so we have a lot of really dull new architecture that everyone here hates and no one can do a thing about. Welcome to democracy.

    Getting around is manageable if you like walking, or cycling and you understand the paper-scissors-stone traffic rule. Bus stops car, taxi stops bike, bike stops pedestrian, except for the one way rule that doesn't apply to bikes; and bike uncertainty principle at junctions or crossings or, well anywhere. Will it stop, won't it stop. The traffic is bad enough that if you do get hit by a bus or taxi it could be the last thing you do as the hospital is miles away.

    There are also some no go areas if you like to donate your recently purchased iphone 5s to a more needy cause, and a large traveller community on the doorstep. Yes Strength and Honour could have been filmed, in Cambridge, or the nearest Witherspoons any Friday night, but for the lack of a decent boxing gym for many miles.
     
    Last edited: Oct 7, 2013
  4. Southpaw535

    Southpaw535 Well-Known Member Moderator Supporter

    Since I live in Portsmouth I'm legally required to laugh at Southampton for being on there.

    Disappointed Pompey isn't though. Mediocre schools, decent unemployment iirc, and awarded the most violent street in Britain. What more do they want?? Although they did tear down the "ugliest building in England" so maybe that's why.

    Surprised by a couple of those actually. Southampton I've always thought of as quite a nice city and High Wycombe didn't seem that bad. Gibraltar doesn't have anything on it other than a mountain and there's only one family that lives on it. Bordon should of been on there.

    Bradford is a good shout though. Points for that one.
     
  5. holyheadjch

    holyheadjch Valued Member

    As someone who lives in Southampton, I am left to nod my head in a resigned fashion.
    Surprised by a couple of those actually. Southampton I've always thought of as quite a nice city and High Wycombe didn't seem that bad. Gibraltar doesn't have anything on it other than a mountain and there's only one family that lives on it. Bordon should of been on there.

    Bradford is a good shout though. Points for that one.[/QUOTE]
    It's a silly thing really to determine these things by public vote. Of course London and Bradford are up there, they're the parts of the country the rest of us would like to see disappear into giant sinkholes, but to have York, Chipping Norton and Gibraltar on there is just plain silly.
     
  6. Johnno

    Johnno Valued Member

    I agree that High Wycombe doesn't seem that bad - but I've only driven through it, so maybe it has hidden depths that aren't obvious to the casual visitor.

    Most places have their good and bad bits. There are parts of Leeds that are profoundly depressing. But if you take the city as a whole then I think it's a pretty good place to live, and many of the gripes could be applied equally to any other large town or city in England.

    I'm genuinely puzzled by the inclusion of York. I can't think of a nicer city in the country.

    Bradford is a weird place, no question about it, but I think it's got too much character to deserve to be in the top ten. I'd rather see those places taken by either soulless dumps (Slough should have been a shoo-in) or by pretentious little places full of tossers (which is what I imagine Chipping Norton is.)
     
  7. Southpaw535

    Southpaw535 Well-Known Member Moderator Supporter

    Yeah it is. Almost everyone I've ever met rips on the place they live and the people I expect to know about this list, and take the time to vote on it, aren't the same kind of people I expect to live in proper crappy places. And London was a given seeing as how many people live there but the couple of times I've been I've absolutely loved the place. Course, those were day trips not me trying to live there.
     
  8. Johnno

    Johnno Valued Member

    I wonder if London got voted top mainly by people who live there, or by people from the rest of country?

    Having lived there for years myself, I think it's got too much going for it to really make it a 'crap town', but I can't help feeling that it deserves it just to stick two fingers up to all the smug fools who assume that just because it's London, it's the best place in the country.

    Sure it's got all the sights, but the centre is an overpriced rip-off, with foul polluted air and full of rude people. In most of the suburbs you might as well be in Birmingham, and pay a lot less to live somewhere really boring.
     
  9. Princess Haru

    Princess Haru Valued Member

    I've been to Harlow once. It needs a mention, and an army of bulldozers. Appears to be a few housing estates surrounded by an industrial estate ring road.
     
  10. Mitch

    Mitch Lord Mitch of MAP Admin

    It's got a very nice judo centre, you should come play one day :)

    Mitch
     
  11. Johnno

    Johnno Valued Member

    Isn't that where the weirdos hang out? ;)
     
  12. Mitch

    Mitch Lord Mitch of MAP Admin

    Absolutely!

    You'll fit right in... :D

    Mitch
     
  13. Bozza Bostik

    Bozza Bostik Antichrist on Button Moon

    10 Stoke-on-Trent!! I'm suprised, should have done better than that! Our chavs should try harder and hopefully it'll get a top 3 place next year.
     
  14. Hannibal

    Hannibal Cry HAVOC and let slip the Dogs of War!!! Supporter

    Morecambe or Barrow would have received my vote as the most depressing crapholes I have ever visited....and I lived in Hull for 6 years abd visited Grimsby (once)
     
  15. Princess Haru

    Princess Haru Valued Member

    If we're including more towns visited 'once' but have no wish to ever see again I'd like to also mention

    Clacton
    Stowmarket
    Paisley
    Haverhill

    I was going to mention Bridgwater and Derby but an online search revealed they might have just enough going somewhere wot I didn't see when there
     
  16. Johnno

    Johnno Valued Member

    I think my personal top ten would be something like this:

    1. Slough - the most unpleasant place on earth, with the most unpleasant people.
    2. Hayes (Middx.) - the is no God, or this abomination would not exist.
    3. Wolverhampton - the seventh circle of Hell.
    4. Birmingham - the second biggest city in England, and there isn't one interesting thing about it.
    5. Woking - a byword for dullness.
    6. Maidenhead - has it's good points, but far more bad ones. Unless you actually like chavs.
    7. Windsor - quite pretty, but it's chock full of clueless posers.
    8. Bradford - it wants to be Leeds, but never will be. Always seems to be stuck in a time warp, twenty years behind the rest of the country.
    9. Manchester - because it's full of pillocks with silly accents, who think they're God's gift.
    10. Wales.
     
  17. Smitfire

    Smitfire Cactus Schlong

    I have to say I like it (and I come from Saahf Lahndahn originally).
    But...it seems to really suffer from a surfeit of idiots of a night-time.
    In particular it's where the Geordies seem to go for hen and stag-nights and after 5 on a Saturday night the city centre can be a nightmare.
    Roaming groups of 10+ carrying blow up willies and not caring who else is around.
    Same on race days. City centre becomes a no-go area due to drunks in suits.
    But it has a great sense of history and "place" that I like.
     
  18. holyheadjch

    holyheadjch Valued Member

    That's an outrageous thing to say! What about the...the...erm...erm...there's a nice library there now and erm...yeah.
     
  19. Simon

    Simon Administrator Admin Supporter MAP 2017 Koyo Award

    I work between Hayes and Slough, near Heathrow Airport.

    Thankfully I get to go home to Kent each night.

    My boss used to say, "have you ever thought about moving closer to work"?

    Er, no, not for one second.
     
  20. Bozza Bostik

    Bozza Bostik Antichrist on Button Moon

    Derby isn't that bad...or should I say wasn't 5 - 10 years ago. I used to go there for record, book and comic shopping when I couldn't get to Notts. Saw a lot of bands play there too, quite a good live music scene. But it's all relative I guess.

    Places like St Helens, Wigan and Leigh are the pits.
     

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