Seventy Five Lessons We Should Learn From Relationships

Discussion in 'Off Topic Area' started by glenchuy, Oct 12, 2004.

  1. glenchuy

    glenchuy has two left feet

    relationships 101.
    a short course on human relationships and love.

    1. if a man/woman wants you, nothing can keep him/her away. if man/woman doesn't want you, nothing can make him/her stay.

    2. Stop making excuses for a man/woman and his behavior.

    3. if you have ANY doubt in your mind about a man's/woman's character, leave him/her alone.

    4. allow your intuition to save you from heartache.

    5. stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.

    6. don't force an attraction.

    7. slower is better.

    8. never live your life for a man/woman before you find what makes you truly happy.

    9. if a relationship ends because the man/woman was not treating you as you deserve then heck no you
    can't "be friends." a friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.

    10. have faith in god regarding your relationship, but don't let faith make you stupid. god does
    things decent and in order.

    11. don't settle.

    12. if you feel like he/she is stringing you along, then he/she probably is.

    13. if he/she keeps changing his mind about the relationship--take that as a BIG sign that he/she is
    unstable. do you really want to be with a man/woman like that?

    14. don't stay because you think "it will get better." you'll be mad at yourself a year later for
    staying when things are not better.

    15. honorable men/women take care of their business and aren't involved in a whole lot of mess.

    16. the only person you can control in a relationship is you.

    17. there's only one 'reason' a man/woman dumps you; he/she doesn't want you.

    18. avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. he didn't marry them
    when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?

    19. you really do have to find a few frogs before finding the prince/princess.

    20. always put yourself and your happiness first.

    21. always have your own set of friends separate from his/hers.

    22. maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. if something bothers you, speak up.

    23. like from the show sex and the city, if the man doesn't call, he just isn't that interested.

    24. be honest and upfront.

    25. know when to cut the cord, don't be strung along.

    26. don't fall for the "i'm confused role". remove yourself from the situation to let him/her figure things out (but don't wait for him/her, move on).

    27. if you want to have a clue as to how he will treat you, watch how he treats the WOMEN in his
    family (not just mom).

    28. there's more than physical abuse, there's emotional and mental abuse. if he causes any of
    them...flee.

    29. you cannot change a man's/woman's behaviors. change comes from within.

    30. don't let him/her place rules on you that he/she is not willing to follow himself --double-standard.

    31. don't EVER make him/her feel he is more important than you are...even if he has more education or in a better job.

    32. do not make him/her into a quasi-god. he/she is a man/woman, nothing more nothing less.

    33. demand respect and if he/she can't give it, he/she can't have you!

    34. don't compete with other man/woman, but be aware that men/women are attracted to what they see.

    35. if you think he/she is cheating, he probably is. confront him/her right away and if you feel he's lying,
    let him go.

    36. actions speak louder than words.

    37. never let a man/woman define who you are.

    38. never rely on a man/woman for compliments, look to yourself for that.

    39. never borrow someone else's man/woman.

    40. if he/she cheated with you, he'll/she'll cheat on you.

    41. just because he says he loves you, doesn't mean that he won't hurt you and it doesn't mean that you are meant to be with him.

    42. to use painful hard-won wisdom -- 'get it right'the next time.

    43. know that you deserve to be the number one person in the life of the #1 person in your life.

    44. love is a verb ...

    45. learn to give up your lifelong task of trying to make someone unavailable -available, someone ungiving-giving, and someone unloving-loving.

    46. a man/woman will only treat you the way you ALLOW him/her to treat you.

    47. all men are NOT dogs. all women are NOT bitches.

    48. you should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two way street.

    49. if you don't love yourself...you can't love anyone else.

    50. you cannot mend someone else's broken heart.

    51. you need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage...deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.

    52. you should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.

    53. Dating is fun...even if he/she doesn't turn out to be Mr./Mrs. Right

    54. NEVER give more in a relationship than you are getting out of it.

    55. never become your man's/woman's "therapist".

    56. when actions and words conflict, believe the actions. respond to the actions.

    57. a real healthy relationship requires two people. one person can end it, but it takes two to make it work.

    58. don't fall for the "i'm not the loving type"...when a man/wp,am loves you there is nothing in this world (within reason) that he/she wouldn't do for you.

    59. make him/her miss you sometimes...when a man/woman always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him/her, he/she takes it for granted.

    60. give him/her his space...let him/her go out with his boys/girls, don't pressure him/her to spend time with you, you cant force him/her to hang out with you.

    61. if you wouldn't allow your daughter/son to be with him/her you shouldn't.

    62. never let a man know everything. he will use it against you later.

    63. never move into his mother's house.

    64. provide financially for yourself and don't depend on anyone.

    65. never co-sign for a man/woman.

    66. never believe you have the perfect guy/girl and he/she is so innocent.

    67. never spoil your man/woman; let him/her spoil you.

    68. never let a man/woman mess up your credit.

    69. when it's time to let go; let go.

    70. good men/women should be treated like good men/women.

    71. don't play games.

    72. you can't make an ogre into a housewife - or husband for that matter.

    73. don't fully commit to a man/woman who doesn't give you everything that you need. keep him/her in your radar but get to know others.

    74. compatibility in terms of educational attainment, values, beliefs, personal and career goals, and socioeconomic status, are important.

    75. never date a guy/girl who wears colored contacts. it's just not natural.
     
    Last edited: Oct 12, 2004
  2. Melanie

    Melanie Bend the rules somewhat.. Supporter

    No wonder I'm flippin single! *sob*!
     
  3. LilBunnyRabbit

    LilBunnyRabbit Old One

    Unless what they want is a work visa and your wallet, trust me on this one.

    If something's gonna work, it'll work, no matter how fast or slow it goes.

    Uh, lacking any faith in god can I just stick with enjoying my relationship as I want to? And what order are things done by god?

    Definitely have to agree with this one.

    Honour is overrated anyway, and once you're in a whole lot of mess, it ain't easy to get out, honourable or not.

    Not sure how many of those I agree with to be honest, but there's some good advice there I guess.
     
  4. KungFuGirl

    KungFuGirl Valued Member

    It's called a restraining order.

    You could tie him/her up in your basement?


    huh?!?!?!?!

    Not always. Sometimes people move.

    lol I pity the woman who couldn't figure this one out on her own.

    No way!!! You can't always put yourself first. It's called compromise. Sometimes you got to suck it up and not have your way. For example, I have sat through boring shows for my boyfriend's sake and he has done the same for me etc, etc. And no, compromise doesn't always make you feel "happy". lol there's an old saying "A good compromise doesn't leave anyone feeling happy" ;)

    lol didn't an earlier quote say to be honest and upfront???


    :eek: Socioeconomic status!!!! Why of course, an aristocrat should never be seen with a peasant. I can just see it now, "Oh I'm sorry, I can't date you since your family doesn't make as much as mine."

    Neither is dyed hair. That's just a strange tip if I ever heard one.
     
  5. Dr.Syn

    Dr.Syn Valued Member

    Whole lotta words of wisdom contained in the above...
     
  6. glenchuy

    glenchuy has two left feet

    ah. but the trick IS to be honest AND never let them know everything. hence, when they ask a sensitive topic, instead of telling the truth, or flat out lying, divert the question! give him/her a hug instead! or uh... pretend to faint! :D

    har har. speaking from experience... :D. maybe i should add uh... "who wear makeup" :D

    btw, they're meant to be taken light-heartedly if ya know what i mean... :eek:
     
  7. KungFuGirl

    KungFuGirl Valued Member



    ...and so are my responses to them. ;)
     
  8. KickChick

    KickChick Valued Member

    No wonder I'm married :D ... happily for many years at that :Angel: :)
     
  9. CrimsonDemon

    CrimsonDemon Valued Member

    Dang, I was so frikkin dumb.... Proves why I've been single for the long I have.

    Oh well, it happenned, now it's over. It's in the past and now no one can do anything about it and I'm happy with my weapons practices. Which is why I'm gonna let "love" come to me next time.

    *copies these rules and then downloads that rap song "I don't wanna know"* I so swear, if you listen to that song, the only thing I didn't do was ask her to leave.

    And to all people out there: I hate pride.

    HONOR!!
     

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