It's a mixture of factors. Partly for the reason of wanting to avoid trouble, yes, partly because I live in a rural cul de sac and going out at night requires money I could be using to save for my education. Why pay money for a bit of crappy quality conversations with drunk people and some crappy music? I have death metal at home that I actually like (please don't jump on me for liking that too) That and I'm just very asocial. And I'm sorry but I don't think it's fair that when you ask how to not get harassed, groped or puked on and people say, well, don't go to those places. Can't win. Neither can you win with self defense options. There's a ton of advice out there about being ready with any weapon you might need to use because if a much larger guy has already grabbed and pinned you the folded knife that is in your inner lining pocket is zero use. But actually listen and you're a paranoid psycho. No, I would not be quick to hurt anyone. As I already described, even when actually grabbed and threatened my instinctive response was to scream, posture and generally freak everyone out, not actually harm. Sorry, not open to more questions about my personal decisions. This was a rape thread not Microlamia's Psychiatric Evaluation.
Yep. We have crazies who nailed a guy to the floor, and another who hung a girl up from the ceiling for over 24 hours.
Hey Micro, I couldn't let this one go...As soon as I saw this I felt compelled to address it. You saw a single photo of a muscly guy and immediately stated that you feel he might rape you in exchange for his protection against rape (or other assualts, I imagine). Admittedly, he doesn't look harmless, speckled in blood and all, but still. This screams out that you have a very unhealthy view of males and likely of other human beings in general. I think that one of the best things you can do for your health, safety, and sanity is to find a good therapist and commit to getting better. I hope all this didn't come out angry - because I'm not. I am actually quite concerned for you and for those around you (in an over-the-internet sort of way). take care
Ok, so upon starting this thread I contacted what I THOUGHT was a respected Women's Self Defense course and told them I am interested in learning more about sexual assault defense and WSD in general. The reply I got was a sales pitch for the course and the exclusive right to teach their program for $1000. And this, my contact adds, doesn't include supplemental materials like films or training equipment. Teach?! How on earth would I be qualified to teach this after a seminar and some film strips?!?! I am extraordinarily saddened by this. I wanted information to keep my loved ones safe and I got "billy mayes" trying to sell me a franchise. (And before I am asked, NO I will not name names. I dont want MAP, or myself, sued.) I'm going to go watch videos of puppies on youtube now. That might be the only thing that can make me feel better.
'Getting better?' Seriously? Here's the thing, you ARE more likely to be raped by someone you already know and trust. So I'm sorry, but unless I know someone very well, I'm not putting myself in a position where he might pull a 'No means yes' on me.
He's not the only one to voice concerns over how you are dealing with the this issue with men (namely opting for seemingly almost complete societal and emotional isolation).
What the heck?. I've explained already why I am mostly asocial. So I should pay money to go out to crappy venues to prove my mental health? Sorry, I'll pass. I'd also like to point out, AGAIN, that whenever I asked for advice on how to deal with that behaviour I was basically told 'Stop participating in society'. But now I took that advice...I'm a paranoid psycho? Really?
No, I'm her younger sister. She's smarter than me, but I'm 7" taller, so we're even. If you see her, do tell her I said hello, and ask her if she ever did get an M18L instead of that crappy handheld stun gun.
my horse-to-water comment was made out of resignation. i didnt intend for it to be rude or condescending. i am sorry it came out that way. no one is telling you not to engage in society. what they are telling you is to engage is "better" society. and "better" in this case means "not the kind of folks who nail people to ceilings". i understand youre telling us that that is your community. i am saying that you need to leave that community. you are saving for school and that is an excellent start. make sure it is one far away and you can stay in their dormitory. good places exist. good people exist. and the kind of help you need exists too. i really hope you find them all because getting to know good people who enrich your life can be a very beautiful thing.
Well you know...fair enough. We're not voicing these concerns because we think you're an idiot. It just sounds a bit extreme from our perspective and would be equally worried if another well loved MAP regular exhibited a similar outlook.
I DO plan on moving elsewhere. I first have to finish my education and get a good full-time job somewhere. And please stop telling me I need help. Honestly I feel that you just can't win. Ask how to deal with violations and you hear 'Well don't go out in the first place'. But actually take that advice and you're a paranoid psychopath. Just great.
A concern for a lack of socialization doesn't mean everyone views you as a paranoid psycho. Most of these users have insufficient education or training in understanding ASD to begin with, so I wouldn't worry too much about anyone's assessment of your mental health here. Their concern, I believe, probably stems from their knowledge that responsible self-defense requires a substantial capacity to navigate subtle social dynamics. You've admitted this is an inherent challenge for you. That is genetics and not your fault. If anyone here claims otherwise, they can go take a long walk off a short peer. However, it does mean that the need for your education on these subjects is greater. In this regard, their concern is not a misplaced and cruel judgement.
Again: Which part of the above makes me insane?? Do you really think I should be spending my savings on going out and socializing with drunk people just to prove that I am mentally sound by normal people's standards? Really?
I appreciate you understanding, but it seems that I'm in the wrong for going to social events but in the wrong if I don't, too. ???
