Problem

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OK heres the scoop, so I started a new job after being laid off from work. Its been almost a week now and everything seemed ok. I discovered through a conversation with a coworker that she did Karate, I tried to show some intrest in the conversation but things quickly took a turn for the weird, she seemed almost offended or put out with me. Next thing I know another guy I work with jumps into the conversation and starts makeing insinuations and borderline threats, all in all It was pretty discourageing, It actually made me think of quitting MA, and that kinda hurts.

 

You'll have to go through the whole conversation if you want some proper feedback. Not enough information.

 

When you say “I tried to show some interest“ - do you mean you came across as a creepy new guy trying to hit on a female coworker?

 

OK this might be a bit long but here it goes.

Im standing around at break and this girl is talking to me about just random stuff, she happens to mention that she does /did Karate for a couple of years, I was kindas surprised and said wow thats awesome I also do Krotty how cool. She then gets this really strange look on her face like she smelled something bad and or was being strangled IDK her eyes started to bulge out though and the veins in her neck suddenly flared out it was kinda scary actually. Anyway this other guy comes over and says something about Kung fu chain punching and how it cant be stopped, he kinda looks me over and snorts then mentions that he knows Akido . He pretty much freaked me out so I just shut up figureing this was more about bull crud than any actual martial arts.

She comes back over to the area looking a bit more cooled down and says she quit because her hand was messed up and bla bla bla, I kinda dropped it. It was pretty strange, I feel kinda weird about it.

 

No weirdo, I wasnt hitting on a coworker...Thats not my style bro.

 

In whose eyes?

 

LOLS, alright wise guys. Thats funny. Im to shy to hit on random strange women. Although she may have assumed that I suppose.

 

Egos are often involved in martial arts debate/conversation in my experience. I wouldn't worry about it.

 

All hail Simon. Thanks bro, that made me smile as a martial artist. :hat:

 

Did you just start working in Master Ken's dojo?

 

Two possibilities:

1) She thought you were hitting on her.
2) You did something to insult her school, her instructor, her ability, or her fashion sense.

The good news is, she'll only hold the grudge for a decade or two.

 

From your account it doesn't sound like you have done anything wrong or acted inappropriately. You will just have to see how things go, it might be that there were a few crossed wires and and you might be able to work around eachother just fine.

There might be some history or something else going on that might explain why they both acted as they did who knows?

Worst case scenario you don't get along with her and or him, unless its a very small work place that shouldn't be a huge issue. It's an unfortunate fact that not everyone gets one with everyone else, some people just rub each other up the wrong way.

 

Im pretty open minded about the martial arts, in fact I have a female instructor at my current club, I got along with her very well actually, shes a third degree BB and weighs about 120 pounds but shes been a tremendous help with my kicking form, seriously.

I guess it was just kinda weird that she suddenly mentioned it, I really thought it was awesome that I wouldnt be a lone ranger martial artist at this new job. Also I dont have a problem working with her, she seems likeable enough.

The guy on the other hand comes off as a thug wanna be that cant make it to work as scheduled and really dosent see it as a problem for anyone let alone him.

I guess I should just drop MA conversations at work, like it was posted just to much ego. One last note here, at the end of the day I was standing next to her at the lockers and showed her the new copy of the Book Of Five Rings my wife recently purchased for me, hopefully that would prove Im not randomly hitting on her.

 

Book of 5 Rings sounds like some weird Tolkien crap to non-MA civilians. She probably thought you have some nerdvana sex dungeon.

 

Totally man! That would work a'right. No married man has ever....and I mean EVER hit on a woman before. It just doesn't happen that way.

 

Damn it man, I dont have a nerd dungeon, Idk what that even is. Im honestly not hitting on her. Its a new job and Im havbeing a hard time fitting in, Im forty and their all twenty, as if thats not bad enough my boss has a short person complex, it kinda sucks.

All I can do is shake it off and take simons advice. Unless someone has a better idea.

 

Well what can I do then, my intentions arnt bad, I was just being friendly.

 

Advice from my side, don't hit on her on New Year party And I mean flirting not hitting.

 

you're asking me? Jesus, I can't even sort my own life out.

they could see you as a weird old guy. It happens to me a lot...I really should stop wearing macs and no trousers. It just feels so good though.

Maybe you're trying to hard. My advice...leave it be, be polite but don't push anything, don't talk about martial arts unless they start up the conversation.